29 May

From The Depth Of My Heart

Whether one believes it or not, when you have met a great, authentic and enlightened guru and when you are able to use your life to practise honestly for the sake of all beings, your life is truly a wish-fulfilling gem. The Guru will take care of everything, he or she is everywhere and you are looked after in the spiritual and mundane sense, so long as you have complete confidence in your guru.

Sadly, even after having met the Guru with the most enlightened qualities or one that is completely enlightened like the Vajradhara, most of us are not that fortunate to be able to understand, realise and appreciate such kind of rare connection. The Guru may give some hardships and may put you in a situation that may seem impossible or ridiculous, but if you carry out all the instructions, no matter how stupid, unthinkable or illogical they are, everything seems to work very well. Obstacles are there but you will somehow manage to cross over them, sometimes with small injuries, sometimes without any scratches. But you will always be a better person. If Marpa didn’t give Milarepa that much hardship, he wouldn’t have become enlightened, all his negative karma due to killing his enemies would not have been purified. No way! But if Marpa is here today, giving us the same kind of training, I think he would be left with no students, no followers and no devotees, he would have no one to pass the lineage to.

I sometimes feel that I am not such a great practitioner. I have a lot of downfalls and I don’t seem to be fulfilling the wishes of my Gurus in terms of my practice and my activities to benefit all beings, because like many of the people these days, I have all sorts of priorities. I am fortunate that I have met some of the greatest Gurus of the last and the present centuries. A few of them are still around, actively guiding me to realise the nature of my mind.

As I told you last time, I was in a relatively short retreat. Just when I was about to end the retreat at around 3pm, my attendant kept knocking on my door saying that my Guru’s attendant had brought a scarf for me. I have kept this retreat a private affair, so except for my close attendants, no one knew that I was in a retreat, most people thought that I was not in town. It was impossible that my Guru and his entourage would have known about it, unless they had a CCTV around me. Although this retreat had a time commitment, I myself did not keep track of the time. After my Guru’s attendant came that day at 3pm to hand over the scarf to me, I found out that it was the exact time that my commitment to the retreat had just ended.

This shows that all the enlightened Gurus have the omniscient mind that works like a modern-day CCTV, following us everywhere and this means that if we have complete confidence in them, whenever we need their attention and their help, they are right there with us. Lama Khyenno!

I immediately went to pay homage to my beloved Guru who has not been very well for quite a while. When he met me, he literally jumped with joy and was so thrilled to meet me. I had not been seeing him as I was afraid to disturb his peace. Of course, we do not need to connect physically, we have our own ways to communicate. But seeing him in his physical presence really moved me, especially he was thanking me for doing a great job, before I could even tell him that I was in a retreat. That means if a disciple does an effective practice with pure motivation to benefit all beings, the Guru knows and receives that as a great wish-fulfilling happiness. What more can a disciple ask, other than to please his or her Guru this way. This has to happen naturally and absolutely without any expectation, without any fabrication. In any sort of spiritual practice, if you have any doubt, expectation, hope and fear, this will create great obstacles in your life. I myself have missed many of these great opportunities because of hope and fear. This is why the Buddha says that the greatest offering is the offering of your own practice and your own enlightenment. I was moved to tears when I saw my Guru being so happy and appreciative of the little retreat that I had completed.

My Guru’s attendant told me that my Guru had not been smiling and laughing for a long time, perhaps due to his frail health. He kept thanking me for meeting our Guru and making him so happy. I really wish I can do a lot more than what I am doing now. Those of us who are fortunate to have met genuine Gurus who are enlightened should not waste our lives.

Whenever I watch National Geographic or Discovery channels, especially whenever they show the food chain of one kind of animals killing other animals, I really feel that we are so fortunate to have this human body. Lions, tigers, crocodiles, pyranas and all the predatory species do not have our privilege as human beings to understand the universal law of karma, so they are always dragged by their killing habits or their foolish habits. Some animals like zebras and elephants have to migrate from north to the south, and everytime they have to cross a river full of crocodiles, many lose their lives while crossing the river. But next year, they do the same thing again because of habitual imprints, I would say. The sad stories happen over and over again, the chain cannot be broken, because the poor animals do not have a solution to stop this cyclic existence.

We as human beings have the intelligence and cognitive function to understand universal law of karma, to stop this cyclic existence and become enlightened, especially those of us who have the great opportunities to meet so many wonderful and honest spiritual masters, who sacrifice their own comfort to come to our world to teach us. Some of us get very soft treatments, some of us get very hard treatments, but we all have this ONE opportunity in THIS VERY LIFE.

I am sharing this with you as a part of my small experience. To end this message, I am making a strong supplication to all the enlightened Gurus in this universe from the depth of my heart, may they live long, happily and heathily!